Lots and Lots

Over the last week or so, I have been running again, planning on doing a 25K, working like a dog, putting in tons of overtime, organizing my shed, baking bread, making cakes, raking leaves, creating blisters, chopping wood, popping blisters, changing diapers, coloring, playing dolls, playing chase, playing..., uprooting dead plants, creating an outdoor potting table and shelves, planning a garden, scheduling planting, sewing monsters, fighting with renter, motivating realtor, stressing about money, picking up pine cones, building a bookshelf, hanging up pictures, smiling at baby, cooing with baby, sweeping floors, mopping floors. and lots and lots.

More Money Please

Whoever said, "Money can't buy happiness," was an idiot.

Guy in a Tie on a Bicycle Ride

Day 2 of the Guy in a Tie experiment was less than extraordinary. I inadvertently dipped my tie in a bowl of cream of wheat during breakfast, and later went for a bike ride to the park with Izzy who sat in the toddler seat behind me as I peddled away tie flapping in the wind. There were a few puzzled looks on the faces of drivers passing by and an extra smiley elderly lady walking her dog at the park, but not much else. I did get a few googly eyes from my old lady throughout the morning, so I guess that's a good enough reason to continue.

I took my annual physical training test at work and it turns out I'm not as fat, slow and pathetic as I thought I was getting. I scored in the top 11 percent of people to ever take that series of test, despite the fact I bench pressed 15 pounds less, leg pressed 80 pounds less, and have a greater body fat percentage than last year. You got to love moving into the older age bracket baby!

Note: I'm still faster than all the younger punks.

Guy in a Tie with a Chainsaw

First things first...I got a chainsaw. Nothing else needs to be said about that. Tim "The Toolman" Taylor grunts are the only acceptable response to such news.

Now, on to my new experiment. In my line of work, it is imperative to understand people - their facial expressions, body language, tone of voice and every little twitch that tells a story in opposition to their words. There is a significant change in people's reaction to me when I am at work versus when I am just tootling around town on various errands. So, I decided to see what kind of differing reactions I can get from people in public by wearing a tie every day for the next month. You need to understand my normal attire is a ratty old pair of jeans with a hole in the crotch and an untold number of various oil, grass, dirt and paint stains. I dress those up with a faded, frayed and frazzled t-shirt which most likely came from some sort of church event in the mid to late 90s. We are talking semi-homeless style here people. I went on my first tie-donned outing earlier to test my experiment in the great social science laboratory that is Target.

The results: 2 Hello Sirs, 1 Excuse me Sir, 7+ charming smiles, and 1 late-middle aged woman checking me out (and I'm not talking about the cash register).

Nasty

Much to the enjoyment of my coworkers, I stepped in an enormous pile of dog poo at work. It took a pressure washer and a soap foaming scrub brush to eradicate the sticky malodorous stench from the intricate network of boot tread. So to all you dog owners, When you are in public PICK UP YOUR DOG CRAP!

Normal

Well, life is beginning to even out again. New baby is settling into a schedule. I am back to work. And wife is back to running. Things seem very normal. Not much creativity being churned out these days, just life moving. I did buy a sweet new axe and chopped some wood. That is about it.

Better than Cheese Burritos

Go buy this book right now! It cost less than a plate of cheesy beef burritos at your favorite Mexican restaurant and it won't leave you with a wicked case of the runs. If you ever thought, I don't know how to grow anything or I don't have enough space for a garden this book will set you straight, son. I guarantee, if everybody with a yard in America had a well used copy of this book on there bookshelf, we would live in a better world.

One of Those Days

Have you ever had one of those days? You know the type of day that makes you step back from your existence for a second and wonder, How in the world did I get here?! Yesterday was one of those days. The type of day where you look back 24 hours and remember sitting on the couch, in your nice and tidy home, sewing a funny doll for your daughter, while in the present you are rolling on the filthy floor of a stranger's home, pepper spray burning a hole through your sinuses, fighting a 6'5" 285lbs. black male with a serious bent toward hurting people. How the heck does a person with a master's degree in Theology who enjoys figuring out how to sew a doll, bake a loaf of bread and garden end up in a profession of bloody knuckled violence...and like it?

Ladies' Man?

Home is Better Than Not Home

The storm draws near. A wintry Arctic blast with lows near 10 degrees is about to rock my new little farm-to-be over the next few days. I spent a chunk of the morning roaming around outside gathering up all the firewood we wood need for the duration. Despite the fact that the previous residents never cleaned out the gutters and still had rusted crusted Christmas lights up from at least 2 years ago, the one good thing I can say for the people who lived here before us was they graciously left behind a pile of neatly cut firewood. After this weekend, it will all be gone and then I will have to pony up some dough for an axe or a small chainsaw.

Hopefully, my little place and my little family can weather the storm without me because I am heading back to work on Friday evening (booooo). I haven't even thought about work since November 20, but I will be leaving my fairytale world of warm cookies, hot fires, good books, the latest DVDs, playing with kids all day, lounging on the couch, and watching football to return to the real world of freezing my buns on the iced over freeway working a 5 car pile-up, extraordinarily long residential burglary reports, the occasional foot pursuit, shoplifters, suicides, traffic stops, life threatening situations, and a bundle of stress. WooHoo. Actually, I enjoy my job. Its just the simple fact that home beats the pants off of not home. But, the bread must be won and the bacon brought. I wish you a warm weekend, if only in thoughts.

Busy Little Beaver

So far today, I raked the yard, started the weekly bread, mowed the yard (with my super awesome reel mower), started a fire in the back yard to burn some old rotten wood and brush, finished the bread, raked pine needles off of the roof, cleaned the gutters, repaired a screen, swept a porch, changed a few diapers, went to the market to get produce, broke down all the boxes from moving to be recycled, finished painting Nathan's new tree shaped cloth diaper drying rack, built a composting bin, and I am about to whip up a fat batch of cookies. What did you do?

Note: That shed in my back yard would be way sweeter if it wasn't completely filled with old crap the owner left behind. I was able to stack it all up on the shelves and organize it all on one side. So, it is usable, though less than ideal.

Room to Move

The move is complete and we are settling into our new casa. This is the back part of the property. Between this wooded area and the house is a shed and an open yard which is soon to become our new produce section. I feel like I can fully stretch my arms and legs for the first time since moving to the city. There is so much room to move and live and play. The new space does provide a lot of new work, but who the heck made the decision that work is bad. Probably some lazy bum who loves the city and cheated his way through life. I say bring on the sweat and blisters. As soon as I finish unpacking all these stinking boxes, I am heading out to get my hands dirty. I also need to build a giant bookshelf, a built in desk, and a drying rack (for cloth diapers) which will be shaped like a little tree. Next, will be burning a bunch of rotten wood and dead leaves (and possibly some cardboard boxes) and then it's time to get ready for some chickens folks. That's right I said it...Chickens. Did I pay the pet deposit? No. Is a chicken a pet? No. There will be chickens. There will be eggs. There will be omelets.